Cafe Andaluz (Or 'that fuckin tapas place just off of George Square' as it's most commonly known in Glasgow)

After a heady night in Glasgow city center, on the piss (of course) for a friends birthday, the five of us decided that tapas would be a much better idea than our usual serving of half-cooked chips n' cheese to wrap the night up. Pretty soon we found ourselves lurching and grunting our way towards Cafe Andaluz on St Vincent Street.
Luckily for us we managed to score a table, which for a Friday night in such a popular restaurant is rarer than a Catholic priest with morals, and no sooner than you can say 'fucking hell that's a lot of food' our table was awash with perfectly formed little portions of absolute tasty.
The service was fast and friendly, although the cost of both drink and food could have bought us a truck full of the aforementioned chips 'n cheese and at least three taxi's home, we did however splash out on four jugs of 'cava sangria' at fifteen quid a pop which although delicious tasted more like fruit juice than booze and wouldn't have gotten me pissed if I was sealed into a giant vat of the stuff.
Every single portion of tapas was great, from the king prawns to the garlic mushrooms (averaging in price from 3.50 to 5.95 per portion so be careful when ordering and keep an eye on the bill tally!) and the only small gripe I had was that some of the staff were either totally ignoring our drunken bullshit or were genuinely Spanish and couldn't understand a word we were saying. At one point one of our group asked for a jug of iced water, a simple enough request that unfortunately resulted in a five minute exchange regarding Spanish holidays, dating Spaniards, airplanes, and lots of confused laughter from both sides. The water never came.

One word of warning though when you find yourself drunk and sitting down hungry in a Tapas restaurant, for the love of God don't buy absolutely everything that you think would be tasty on the pretense that they are all baby-sized portions. Three of these per person is still quite a bit of food and you'll find yourself fuller than you thought you would be.
Don't be a dick and order 5-6 items each like we did.
That's just fucking madness.

Jamie's Italian kitchen Glasgow

At last! As unbelievable as this may sound I actually have nothing but good things to say about a place! After blagging a couple of tickets to Jamie Oliver's new Glasgow eatery's test day I have to say I wasn't expecting anything special, but then again I'm a grumpy little bastard and I never do...

Initial thoughts were, shall we say, confused. The inner decor was a mash up between a Russian factory and a Parisian bakery but somehow it actually worked and the staff seemed warm and friendly, with a surprising amount of tattoos on display. It just felt really relaxed to be honest which is unusual for a busy restaurant in Glasgow city centre, especially during a test run opening.

I opted for some kind of mushroom 'rice-ball' thingy's with garlic and tomato dip for my starter and garlic tagliatelle for my main course and I have to say that if it wasn't for the horrific hangover I was still suffering from the day before then it may have been the best meal I've had all year, definitely an eight out of ten! The food was well cooked and tasty and the service was friendly and prompt, as far as prices go it is a bit expensive but no more than any other restaurant round that area of the city center. Dino's is probably more expensive and this stuff beats the shit out of Dino's...hands down! In quality if not quantity though as my only slight gripe was that the portions themselves aren't more than a handful, but if you like 'em bigger ( and most of us boys do...) then you could always just opt for the larger portion, it's almost double the price but by god you won't leave that building hungry.Unless you're a big, greedy fat bastard that is, or maybe you just have a 'thyroid' problem...fatty..

TONY MACARONI   

4-10 Byres Road
Glasgow G11 5JY

FOOD

she-devil got a burger and chips and, although the burger was good, the chips were only half cooked and hard in the middle so i got lumbered with them in the end. I opted for the (baby portion) of mushroom risotto which was surprisingly tasty but hardly suitable for an adult, two for one deals only work if the food portions arent halved guys!
Oh and bringing the food out in giant plates doesnt make the portions look any bigger so don't even try that shit with me.
Overall not very impressed this time round, which is crap really considering the pizza in here is top nosh.

STAFF

we were seated in about three minutes and served within ten so overall service was good but a smile from just one of the staff wouldn't go amiss, your face wont crack you know...well it might, but i'm pretty sure it wont!

GENERAL LOOK / FEEL

If tacky was good then this place would be awesome, but it's not so instead it's just tacky. If you're thinking of opening a rustic style Italian restaurant then filling your shelves with old pots, jugs and jars just wont cut it, after a while it just feels like you're eating your dinner in some mental old hoarders dusty house. The huge television on the wall did mean i could watch the football and ignore the she-devils random babbling though so i guess you gotta take the good with the bad.

CLEANLINESS

no problems in this respect, place was spotless when we were in, and the toilet was just as clean as the restaurant. Now if they only had their cleaners cooking the chips and sorting out the risotto portions this place would be on the right track.

COST

Not too shabby, drink prices were pretty standard for the west end and the 'two for one' menu covers quite a lot although i would check what special offers are running at the time. If you are going for the special menu then i would advise you go for the burger or the pizza which are tasty enough, and portioned for grown ups and not hobbits.
Just make sure you ask for your chips well done if you get the burger though!

MARKS OUT OF 10     7/10

A few dodgy chips and a baby portion of risotto let the side down badly, grumpy staff i can handle as long as the food is good enough to gloss over it, get the finger out guys...I'll be back!